ANOTHER IMPOSTER

I put this clown into the ditch lickity-split. My truck was bigger than his...GIT-R-DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IF THIS IS YOUR VIEW, YOUR DAY CAN ONLY GET BETTER

Good news.... I was only 45 seconds away from winning the whole sport clyde race(both age groups) riding the rigid singlespeed.


Bad news......As this guy says, That makes me the first loser.....I was edged out by the only guy I could not afford to lose to.

Now I must battle with Holcomb for the series overall on his home course. He has had input on the layout of the course as well........Should be interesting.

IMPOSTER!!!!

I can assure you if this were my party, you all would have been invited.

DA-SUG HAS A FUNNY WAY OF DOIN' STUFF

PRODUCT TESTING

So I break my frame and the Fisher folks send me a new frame, eccentric (ik-sen-trik) and one of these "fancy-shmancy" carbon forks. I just assumed they needed a crash test dummy for some product testing. Now...I'm quite sure these two can put the Switchblade fork through the paces big-time, but unless they are riding with one on the others shoulders or have a full keg strapped to their backs(I think example 2 is more likely) they are not leaning as much tonnage on it as I can. So it was off to Chequamegon for my first real "taste" of rigid singlespeeding.

Thursday was my first ride on the new set up. We rode the Ojibwa trail right next to the Hayes guy's condo. I must agree with Jay ......This is quality singletrack...Pretty darn bumpy, and the fork was really cool. Friday was a short easy pre-ride on a section of the 40 course and an early crash(bed that is)to prepare for Saturday's events.

The 40 came and went in 03:23:40.8 shaving 5 minutes off last year's time. Da Monsta and The Darkness(congrats to both) finished just a few minutes ahead of me robbing me of my podium spot, but I'll live............and I am happy to report that the bike,the fork and the Bubba are all in one piece and no worse for the wear.

I'm still trying to find out if these forks have a weight limit and I'm just lucky to be alive,or are they rated "Bubba-tough"??

Thanks to the Hayes guys for the post-race beers and hospitality.

Killn' it

40....OFF TO DA NORTWOODS EY'

Leaving at 6am Thurs. to get in some riding on the Rock lake trails. I know you will all be patiently awaiting the 2nd worst race report of all time.

Check here for the worst one.

I'M AT A DIS-ADVANTAGE.......

The fast guy's always have cool race reports. How can I write an interesting one like this guy, this guy, or this guy???? I can't..... However, now that Iv'e started and refuse to DNF, here goes.

The day started with a few of my fellow sport clydes bustin' my chops because they did not see my name on the weigh-in sheet. I forgot. So off I go to registration to weigh in. As I was about to step on the scale, I asked Minigoat (who was volunteering) if I looked like I lost 42 lbs. in the last couple days??? I don't remember her response. NOPE....gained 2.

Don yells gooooooooooooo and I'm feelin' pretty good on the lead out. Did not even notice my new 2 lbs. until we hit the hill climb. I was sufferin' at a turtle's pace all the way to the top. Once at the top, I turned my 244 lbs of rolling momentum to the desents, "gutterballing" almost out of control trying to make up the time lost inching up the climbs.

This was repeated the final 2 laps and wound up being good enough for second place and 1 step closer to winning my series overall, but the fat................................................tires and beer guy is going to battle until the bitter end.

If I get a new rig, and am able to keep it in 1 piece....I intend to finish the year singlespeeding. Someday I will find the stones to race SS on a ski hill .

5 BUCKS.....AND I BET I CAN'T BREAK IT

My wife scored this beauty at a rummage sale in Rhinelander last weekend. The chick who sold it to her must have needed a cocktail or a pack of smokes real bad because she originally wanted 15 dollars, but took 5. Julie actually made me take it for a test-drive to see if I thought it was worth the money. She bought it for Russell's 4th of July "Crappy Bike Ride". Now she better get training because she got dropped this year and that thing is a tank.

CAN YOU SEE MY CRACK???

Yep....That's the 3rd frame this year. In fact I was dropping this off and picking up my waranteed Sugar at the same time. Both Rigs cracked in the exact same place. One Memorial Day weekend and one Labor Day weekend.
Here is a better look.
Glad I have the Surly now because I'm registered for Chequamegon as a SS'er.

I have taken the liberty to post Mountaingoat's comment for him.

NEW RIDE

One less skeleton in Da Monsta's closet and a new winter bike for me. I was able to put gears back on my old Specialized and sell it to my buddy Billy at work.I then turned the cash over to Ron and put the SS parts on.........Presto

GET A LIFE

That's what my wife and Coop told me after listening to me whine and sulk about my complete meltdown at Devil's Head last week. I'm over it and better days are to come.
Thursday, Julie and I ditched the knuckleheads for a short trip to the nortwoods hey! We started in Rhinelander, the home of my cousin Amy and her boyfriend Terry. They turned me on to the Smokin' Spoke trails. A local bike shop puts on an early season race there and if you have not ridin them, it is definately worth a try. If fact we ran into WORS Don there on Friday riding with the potential race director who is trying to get it as a replacment for one of the races that will be lost after this season.
I ran into Don again Saturday at the WEMS race at Stump farm and he admitted he was checking out both places as possible replacment venues. I talked to him about it briefly and wish I could tell you I had some kind of inside scoop, but Don is not really one to "show his cards."
I think both of these courses would make for great WORS races to replace Kewaunee and Calumet. He actually mentioned that he may need to find 3 new race venues, but did not say which other one may be out.??..??

Alright.... enough business and on to some of what has made this blog what it is today.........LAME-ASS........
I did my first 6 hour solo race at the Stump Farm on Saturday. O.K...so I show up with a gallon of gatorade, 2 salted nut rolls, and a box of cheez-its. Ronsta and Coooop just shook their heads really putting a dent in my fragile self-asteem. So I ask them for a little advice as this was my first race of this kind.
Ron advised me to eat and drink from start to finish to avoid the big bonk. Easy enough.....I've eaten and drank for 6 straight hours plenty of times before. Coooop suggested wearing 2pair of shorts to keep the "grumpy-ass" to a minimum.
I knew I could count on these guys. My wife ran to the store and got me some decent food and I had no problems with the backside whatsoever.

MELTDOWN

Does yakin' up a couple Cliff shots on an empty stomach count as puking??

A PICTURE SAYS A THOUSAND WORDS

BLOGGIN' AINT EASY..................BUT LAME-ASS BLOGGIN' IS

I am finding that people actually do tune in here to read this stupid dribble and quite honestly I'm feeling a little pressure to keep y'all entertained. I have also come to realize that all blogs are not created equal. I'm sure this blogging machine knows his place on the "food chain". Old Captain-quick-link is at the top of just about every link list out there.

Surprisingly, I have experienced pretty good feedback when making fun of myself. I will coutinue to do so because if you can't make fun of yourself...who can you make fun of????

Oh...A very lame showing tonight at the metro race at Crystal Ridge did A BIG FAT NOTHING to help me make a decision about the weekend.

WTF DO I DO NOW??????????????

I do not have a mountain bike with gears right now. While I really like riding SS, racing them requires a set of mid-section marbles that I have only been able to produce twice so far this season. I thought I would finish the year SS'ing at The Rapids and Sheboygan, but it was never in the plans for Devil's Head for sure.
Race or volunteer becomes the question for this weekend.??????

Reasons to volunteer
1. I would get quality volunteer points as I am in a battle for the series win.
2. Jamie and Megan are really doing well this year and I have not been able to watch them race. If they let me volunteer on the course somewhere, I could do that.
3. I should do it because, as Coop says, volunteers are needed to make these events what they are. He has volunteered in WORS, WEMS, and at the Wed. night metro races.
4. It may rain (but I like racing in the rain).

Reasons to race
1. Racing is cool(even for a fat, old, slow guy)
2. It might rain. On the single, that may be a plus.

I better pull my head out of my ass and make up my mind.

BUSTED.........DISGUSTED.............AND CAN'T BE TRUSTED

My Sugar frame is cracked.....busted. No, not a little stress crack like my bitch's, but snapped in half on the top tube where it meets the shock mount. I know what you are thinking...NO WAY !!! Not a Sugar. However a little research has turned up a few folks who have experienced durability issues with this particular bike. Big Mark, Big Jim, Big Russell, Big Coop, Big Kenny D(I think) and now Little Bubba have all busted these at one time or another. Funny thing is I think all these guys and others really like these bikes when they can keep them in one piece.

So, I take the bike to the shop last night and who is in there buying a couple bikes for himself, his wife, and little kid??? Danny Gadzuric..center for the Milwaukee Bucks. For a guy that recently inked a 36 million dollar deal, he was scoring some pretty entry level equipment. I recommended the Sugar (pointing to my busted one) He chuckled.

2ND-3RD........4TH 2ND

Jamie and Meg finished 2nd and 3rd overall in the womans sport race Sunday. They really seem to be coming in to thier own and improving every race. I, on the other hand took 2nd for the fourth race this year. I may have hit the wall.

We collectively, however have not gotten much better with experience when it comes to the podium. While this and this isn't too bad, this just doesn't cut it. My podium shortcomings have been well documented.

I WON A REALLY NICE BOTTLE OPENER AT THE BIKE RACE YESTERDAY.

JUNK

-Got my ass handed to me at the beatdown last night as usual, but made it further than ever before. Good ride for me.
-Speaking of my ass...it's finally back to normal after 24-9. Must have been the humidity.
-I could really use a decent race at Calumet Sunday. I have never done well there. Calumet was my very first WORS race back in 2002. It was also my first and only DNF.(flatted with no tube , tools, or air) rookie move. I have brought myself in on fumes and my bike across the finish line in pieces, but I'm not a big fan of the DNF.
-No news on my Poprad. I wonder what color they will be offering in 2008??
- I need to get working on the trails in front of my house. They need my attention.
-I need to build a shed and lay some pipe(drainage) in my back yard. I am starting to think this may not happen this year. Whatever...................................................

ROCKSTARS.....A VERY RARE PHOTO

Judging by the looks on their faces, they thought they were these guys. Yes.....That's mabeeeaatch on the right anchoring his Extreme Dream Team boys to the podium in the kids race (12 hour). In fact Team Extreme had a nice showing overall with our youth team wrapping up 1st in their 12 hr race by about noon on Saturday. The Hoffman's placed well (7th) in the 24 hour duo....and they were co-ed although Candy really showed she had quite a "set of stones". After Big Mark took a digger Saturday, The Extreme team of Dr Dave, Rick Walls, myself , and the fill-in Tim Montee placed 8th out of 25 teams in the 24 hour mens sport race. I told Coop," We must have been more desparate than I thought, we grabbed a Hayes guy" Coop said " Smart move,NOW you have a chance" (note to self....come a little heavier next time you want to be a smart-ass to Coop.)

I had a blast for my first 24 hr event and will put it high on the "must do" list for next year.

Highlights include;

Drinking Big Mark's white gas for his camp stove because it was in the same looking bottle as my water. I did not swallow it though, instead opting to spit it out at Nitnylion's campsite. Got a match??

Helping Cathy (The Michael's Cycles girl) out to the road after she crashed pretty good on my 2am lap. She thanked me Sunday morning and said she had to go to the hospital for 6 stitches in her elbow. I felt pretty good about helping her out.

The same 2am lap I passed a 50 yr old chick(cause I can do that) on some CC ski trail, I then headed into a piece of singletrack and she said "There's another one behind us coming 100mph. Sure shit...A light was headed up the trail and it was moovin. As it approached she exited the trail. At the last second I hopped off between a couple of pines to allow the pass in what was a very sweet technical move on my part if I do say so myself. Guess Who???? By the time I processed the Alterra kit he was gone and I missed my chance at a good wise crack. I did tell the 50 yr old chick behind me,"I know that dude" She said "How can you tell, all I saw was a blur". Then I showed my "Macho" by dropping her for good.

Pics. of Phillips and myself were stolen from a much better blog than mine.